Check out this sheet of RIDICULOUS potential sentence starters I found:
- A hard on doesn’t count as personal growth.
- Do I look like a fucking people person?
- This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting.
- I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it left.
- I pretend to work. You pretend to pay me.
- If I throw a stick, will you leave?
- And just how may I screw you over today?
- And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be…?
- I’m just working here ‘till a good fast food job opens up.
- I’m not your type; I’m not inflatable.
- I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
- Someone here is is thinking about sex. Okay, it’s me.
- I have a computer, a vibrator, and pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house?
- I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
- It’s sick the way you people keep having sex without me.
- I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.
- Okay, okay, I take it back! Unfuck you!
- Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
- You look like shit. Is that the style now?
- Earth is full. Go home.
- I thought I wanted a career; turns out all I wanted was paychecks.